The Official Nonsense Thread

[Minty]

National Theatre? Ooo lucky you! My brother & his wife went there (in one of their rare moments of attempting to get some culture instead of visiting other places to go to the same old shops every other city had) & loved it.

Alan Bennett - he's a good writer, but I would like to have words with him re The History Boys over its historical revisionism. There were no academic league tables in the early 1980s for schools to climb (that was a far later idea, John Major's I think, ironic considering he left school with only one O Level!) and the character of the openly gay Posner was downright offensive - any school kid "coming out" in the 1980s even to his mates would have sentenced themselves to a guaranteed eight hours a week day of being subjected to random intimidation & outright violence. There may have been Bronski Beat & Culture Club in the Top 10, but 80s Britain remained a very intolerant place.

I'm now battering through the second season of Game Of Thrones. Arya's been "rescued" of sorts by Tywin Lannister. Agh, please don't let her do anything stupid & blow it!

[Caspin]

It's a great theatre: hideous on the outside (in my opinion) but so well-designed inside. You get great views of the stage no matter where you sit, so even if you have the cheaper seats you will have a good experience.

The play was OK. It was about the National Trust bidding to take over some crumbling old country house and an exploration of the pros and cons of that. It had some humorous moments, when they started filming an adult movie in the living room, for example. I saw 'The History Boys' - that was a good play, although you are no doubt right about the not-quite-right representation of the '80s in some respects.

But wow - series two already! You are ploughing through them!

[Caspin]

I was sent this crib sheet for Game of Thrones. It still makes me chuckle. "Cool girl's murder friend".

[Minty]

(15-05-2013 09:49 PM)Caspin Wrote:  I was sent this crib sheet for Game of Thrones. It still makes me chuckle. "Cool girl's murder friend".

In an upcoming episode of Game of Thrones, Arya Stark escapes with Gendry & Jaqen H'Ghar, realising only they can stop the war.

Reaching King's Reach, they are confronted by The Hound & Ilyn Payne. Arya argues with them that for the good of Westeros, they need to join forces, because the King is a complete puddle-drinker, his mother & real dad are evil puddle-drinkers, in fact if they think about it round about everyone in the whole city but them & Tyrion Lannister are puddle-drinkers.

Overwhelmed by such irrefutable logic, The Hound & Ilyn Payne aid them in attacking the city, the king's guard instantly yielding knowing they've not got a hope of beating such a cool gang. King Joffrey is beheaded & his utter bitch of a mother is hung over the city walls covered in jam so she is stung to death by wasps. Everyone in the city cheers at this turn of events.

Tyrion Lannister is offered the throne, but he points out it would be far funnier giving the Iron Throne to the fat baldy eunach as it will really piddle off Petyr Baelish, which will serve him right for betraying Ned Stark & having really stupid facial hair. Everyone agrees.

Upon hearing the news, Princess Daenerys Targaryen renounces her claim to the throne, because she doesn't want to sit on the same seat the fat eunach has sat on, & besides which she has cool dragons & so everyone else now sucks not to be her. Lord Tywin Lannister goes home in a terrible huff because "now you're all just being silly & not playing the game properly!"

HBO should have episodes like this!

[Caspin]

Who could ever say biology is boring? It offers aliens, vampires, zombies and lethal cocktails!

(16-05-2013 12:13 AM)Minty Wrote:  hung over the city walls covered in jam so she is stung to death by wasps. Everyone in the city cheers at this turn of events.

So she comes to a sticky end, eh?! (Apologies)

Hey, don't rush too far ahead with spoilers - I've only seen series 1 and 2!

But you are joking about the jammy death, right?!

[Minty]

If you saw the wasp I discovered hanging underneath an opened window sill in my house today (at the risk of exaggerating, it must have been at least ten metres long) you'd be in no doubt about the evil garden species coming out this year. I'm beginning to regret worrying over the lack of insects, as Mother Nature is upon us with a vengence.

The jammy death. If only!

I have just completed series 2 & the first episode of series 3 - the battle was epic, but I am raging at the way Tyrion was treated after the way he saved ALL their miserable asses. If they'd defended the way the Incest Bitch Cow & their daddy wanted, they'd have lost. I'm wondering how long the Imp's going to be provoked before he decides there are some families not worth the loyalty, his for a start. I also think the Starks may have blown it with Rob Stark reneging on his marriage promise on top of losing Winterfell.

Every time you think one family is coming out on top, they blow it for themselves one way or another, usually by being petty minded over old scores or taking friends for granted. This at least guarantees keeping it all going, but I'm wondering if by the end of season three Princess Barenerys (I know what I mean!) may have got her shiz together enough to become a credible threat after all. There's nothing like complete idiots, especially psychotic untrustworthy ones to get other nobles saying "at least you knew where you were with the Targrayens, so long as you remember to bump them off before they reach forty when they all turn mad."

Something that's also bothering me. Why do I get the sneaky feeling Lord Tywin Lannister knew very well he had Arya Stark working for him, yet let her go? That remark he made to her about posing as a commoner. Yeah, she smoothed her way out of it, all the same, not like him to miss a trick. Or was this a sign that the advancing years means he's losing his touch?

Oh, I LOVE this show!

[Caspin]

Last year we had loads of ladybirds coming indoors. I tried to diligently catch them in a tube if I thought they were those invasive harlequin ones. Unfortunately I could not, despite staring for ages at pictures of them, identify which was which, as none of them looked exactly like the pictures and I didn't want to mistake any of the natives, so in the end had to give up and release them all. At one point there were dozens crawling around on the windows (inside and out). People seem to think they are very pretty, which they are, but harmless. But they do bite on occasion.

At least we don't get swarms of locusts as they do in other countries. That would freak me out!

I like insects - they're interesting. Just not mosquitoes because I get sick of their itchy bites and not wasps because they are evil and being stung once was quite enough.

We need some of that GoT green wildfire to take out the wasps!


I agree about the horrendous treatment of The Imp but at least his girlfriend stuck by him and now he will have a manly battle scar!

I thought that Tywin did know who Arya was but let her go because he admired her pluck, but I could be wrong about that.

[Minty]

The pundits are saying Denmark only have to turn up to win Eurovision tonight. The real battle is for last.

Stick yer money on Bonnie Tyler, her song's total crap!

[Caspin]

I usually support Azerbaijan, regardless of their song and for no logical reason at all.

[Ollie]

Jeez, talk about spoilers. That's just as bad as snape killed dumbledore. Whoops spoilers.